Posts Tagged ‘christianity’

I am grateful

Sunday, March 31st, 2013

I am grateful for the lumberjack who fell the tree.

I am thankful for the carpenter who hewed the tree into a cross.

I am appreciative for the blacksmith who fashioned the nails.

I am beholden to the merchants who sold these items to the Roman army.

I am thankful for the moneychangers who financed these transactions.

I am grateful for the appointed representatives of the Jewish government.

I am thankful for Pilate and his soldiers.

I am especially beholden to the people who voted for, paid for and in anyway supported these murdering governments.

I am particularly thankful for Jesus who ordered his brethren to pay for his murder and very thankful that he ordered all of his subsequent disciples down through the years to pay for their version of murdering governments.

I am especially grateful to Paul who ordered all the Christians to vote for, pay for and support their version of murdering governments for the last 2000 years.

Without all of these contributors to murder I would not have anyone to save!

God

Christianity in one sentence

Saturday, March 16th, 2013

Got this from Richard McCargar

“Christianity in one sentence:

Only an immoral, insane god would “bless” a family? with a baby that the god has marked with a sin for an act it didn’t commit, then kill himself [or his son] to save us from his eternal damnation.”

The Christian idea of “sacrifice” is bull shit!

Sunday, February 10th, 2013

The Christian idea of “sacrifice” is bull shit. The idea that Jesus “sacrificed” Himself to save all the sinners is just flat out bullshit. Jesus sacrificed nothing. Assuming he is the Son of God right now then his position today is exactly the way God created it in the first place. Nothing lost. And only through loss can there be a sacrifice.

Yes, he suffered a great deal of pain for the express purpose of demonstrating to his flock what a bunch of murderers they are but hey that hardly qualifies his death as a “sacrifice.”

How in the hell did a “murder” get turned into a “sacrifice?”

If it was a genuine sacrifice, why didn’t Jesus just jump off a cliff?

Why exactly did he have to use or manipulate others into killing him? Who does that to the ones they love?

How in the hell did murder by government get turned into a sacrifice by the murdered victim?

Because, some Christian will say, He was the Son of God and could have stopped it at any time.

Oh really? You are the Son of God and you cannot cure yourself of the common cold let alone call down angels to wipe out Washington DC so why do you think Jesus was any different than you?

It is right there in your Bible. Jesus called us brothers. See Hebrews 2:11-13. He said we could do everything he could do and more as John 14:12-14 points out.

“I tell you the truth. The person that believes in me will do the same things I have done. Yes! He will do even greater things than I have done. Why? Because I am going to the Father. And if you ask for anything in my name, I will do it for you. Then the Father’s glory will be shown through the Son. If you ask me for anything in my name, I will do it.” (ERV)

It was murder by government! In fact, it was murder by two governments. The Israelite government (call it the state government) and the Roman government (call it the federal government.)

Not any different than the governments you and your forebears created, vote and pay for!

Today, we kill Jesus with drones. We dispensed with the charges, trial, conviction and the appeals. We kill him using your sons and daughters as the executioners. We imprison him for using drugs and kill him if he resists. We put him away forever for changing marigolds into marijuana. We must inspect and force him to pay a tax on the water he turns to wine. We force him at the point of a gun to support your governments with his labor. We demand he sign a pact with the devil on a 1040 form. We have burdened him with 10’s of thousands of rules and regulations. We insist he use counterfeit money produced by the moneychangers. We demand to see him naked before he flies. We insist that his entourage carry no assault swords. We arrest him for visiting Mary Magdalene.

Supernatural Fucking

Friday, February 8th, 2013

The God of Genesis must be an idiot. How could He not know that if you stick two humans in paradise and tell them they can do anything they want except eat of that one tree, then eating from that tree will be the one thing they do? I mean really how can an all knowing spiritual being not know the nature of human nature that He created? Forbidden fruit is the sweetest.

OK, so according to the Christians we are condemned to death or firey hell or cease to exist or purgatory or whatever depending on your flavor because of the sin of disobedience and subsequent sins many of which I committed but lucky us God has a solution. Send His Son to die on the cross to save us from our sin. I mean someone has to die, right?

So how do you suppose that conversation between God and His Son went down? Did Christ suggest a solution or was Christ enjoying the company of a number of virgins and the Father approached Him?

“Hey Son, I have a dilemma. You know all those clay figures I created down there on earth? Well they have sinned against me and I have decreed death for them so would you mind becoming one of them and have yourself murdered for the purpose of the saving them? That way I am seen as good to my word and you get to be the hero!”

“Well sure Dad, all these naked virgins are getting a bit boring!”

Or was it Christ who brought it up?

“Hey Dad really, aren’t you being a bit harsh with that death sentence and all? I mean really it was just a little fruit. But, since you are the Law how about if I become a clay figure and get myself murdered for them? You know like a chicken or pig or goat that you have the little clay figures kill for you? We can call it my sacrifice for them. I get the death penalty satisfying your rather bizarre desire for death, fiery hell, etc., and the clay figures get to join us up here if they believe that is what I did for them.”

“Great idea Son!”

Now how exactly did this pregnancy of Mary go down? God the Father right? Mary one of God’s Children. OK, weird! OK, God did not do it, the Holy Spirit did! Even weirder!

I mean come on! Supernatural fucking with a capital “S?” You have got to be kidding me!

Right about now is where I get hit with the “God’s wisdom is foolishness to man.”

Alright, so we are in agreement that hell is my “final destination.”
So? Have you ever been around a bunch of Christians? On the 9th Day (to borrow from Paul Harvey) God created boring Christians to sit in church every Sunday to tell God what a great guy He is. We are back to weird again.

Christianity

Wednesday, January 30th, 2013

One day an all powerful, all knowing spiritual being created little clay figures, animated them and give them a garden of paradise and let them do anything except of course, eat from the one tree. When they partook from that tree, out of the garden He sent them. Being an all powerful, all knowing and all loving spiritual being and having decreed death to the little clay figures an extension of Him, His Son, took it upon Himself to become a little clay figure and give up his clay figure as a sacrifice to save all the other little clay figures. Any who believe this little story gets to spend eternity with the all powerful all knowing and all loving spiritual being. Those who don’t either cease to exist or spend eternity in hell fire and brimstone.